We were talking about a melancholy incident which took place in Banagram Paramananda Mission. We are now in front of many queries. We will now notice the next incidents – perhaps, we will get answers many of the queries from these incidents.
Murari Maharaj and the other sannyasis and brahmacharis took the dead body of Bapi [Bapi was then 12 years old. The previous year, he was initiated ( for a Brahmin boy, a ritual ceremony is held once upon a time )] and brought it to his village house along with the family members of the house, the villagers and numberless people. At first I had not gone with the body but it was difficult for me to stay in the ashram. So, I went to the Mukherjee house. I went there and saw that there were many people. It was so crowded that I was not able to enter the house. Passing the crowd, I moved ahead as possible and I saw there that Bapi’s body was laid in the middle of the premises. I also noticed that Guru Maharaj was standing there. ( Who knew, He came here when!!!) Holding the body, Trishan Maharaj was crying. N’Kaka was crying. All the family members of the house were crying loudly. The tears welled up in the eyes of the people, present there. And Chhoto Kakima??? That day, I saw such a pathetic scene which I would not forget in my life. Manifestation of heartrending pain of a mother who was just sonless – Oh, no great enemy would face this situation in his or her life!!!
Entire the time, Guru Maharaj was standing like a statue in a particular place – and Chhoto Kakima was hitting her forehead to Guru Maharaj’s feet and she was continuously crying and telling with mournful voice, ” Baba Thakur ( God Himself), you are God yourself. You can do all things possible. Then, you return my son Bapi, back. Mej Di ( In Bengali Mej or Mejo means the next after the elder. Here, Mej Di is Tapi Maa’s mother) says that you have made survive Hari (Hari Maharaj), you have made survive him curing his fatal disease. Then, you make survive my son.” Chhoto Kakima told these words in what way, in what pathetic voice, hitting her forehead to Guru Maharaj’s feet – the people who had seen this, they would never forget. The women of the family and other neighbouring women were making her stand up but Chhoto Kakima was falling herself to Guru Maharaj’s feet quickly, loosing all the hands – capturing her. I still pray – “Hey God, – that pathetic scene and the heart breaking mourning of a mother, just sonless – no one sees it ever.”
Now I come back to Chhoto Kaka. Chhoto Kaka was sitting on the verandah of the house. Madan Maharaj and one or two villagers were present there holding him. Chhoto Kaka was never going to Bapi – just a distance away, he was lamenting like an insane person – ” What has happened to Bapi? What has happened to me? Has something else happened to Bapi?” It seemed that it was a defeated father’s severe helplessness to the cruelty of God. There was no way to avoid pathetic truth – knowing all things, it was as if to see nothing, to know nothing. It was as if to pretend not to acknowledge something, knowing all things.!!!
How long was spent in this way? It was spent unless Chhoto Kakima was senseless.
[ Translated by Ramprasad, a former student of Banagram Ashram.]
BANAGRRAM MEMORIES – (71)
